I feel like I have so many things I want to say lately, but never the presence of mind to actually say them, so I’ll try to summarize.
I’m in a kind of weird place as far as the move goes. It’s just a strange feeling. I guess I thought I would feel like a whole different person after finally making the leap and moving away, but I feel the mostly the same.
Not completely the same though – I do feel a little out of place and generally awkward. I don’t quite fit in here yet and I feel a little bit lost, but I’m completely okay with that. I’ve always liked the feeling of being a small fish in a big pond. The anonymity of it excites me.
I’m also really excited about the future and seeing how things go out here. Everything is so open and unknown and I have no idea what the next days, weeks and months are going to look like. It’s kind of thrilling.
Lastly, I really miss my people. It takes a long time to obtain a group of people who know you from the inside out and love you for exactly who you are. It’s something to be cherished, and I miss those people dearly.
For instance, I miss the SIL, who among many things was my wine person back in Oklahoma. She kept me in the know. Now, I have to seek out my own wines.
Abby recently mentioned that she liked this Vineyard, so when I saw a bottle of their Merlot I decided to give it a whirl.
The problem is, I don’t really think I like Merlot? Either that or I just don’t know what it’s supposed to taste like. I like most reds – Cabs, Pinot Noirs and Malbecs are my favorites – but I don’t have a go-to Merlot that I enjoy.
It’s okay though, it’s good to try new things. They may not always turn out exactly the way you expected them to, but the experience is (almost) always worth it.
My life has become a whirlwind of newness, and even though it’s different than I thought it would be, I love it. I wouldn’t change a thing.
Do you like to be a big fish in a small pond, or a little fish in a big pond?
Any favorite Merlots I should try?
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I am a regular follower of your blog. I myself moved to Northern Virginia last month and totally understand what you are going through. So much of uncertainty and so much of “I dont belong here” feeling! Probably you should list out all the good things about the place which you have started liking. I do it more often to make myself feel better!
How exciting! Where did you move here from?
I moved from Florida(where I moved from California and stayed for just a month!) My life has been quite a moving drama!
I’m not a merlot girl but do LOVE Bogle’s chardonnay! It’s yummy, and on sale a lot at Kroger -bonus!
That’s a good question – I can’t say I like either extreme. I like to be in a tight knit group doing whatever – whether it be with people we know (small pond) or in a big place (like college or Atlanta). I’m a safey-in-numbers girl and can seriously never imagine doing what you’re doing – you rock! And you will definitely find peeps who love you for who you are – you’re so open so whether you think so or not I have no doubt you make friends easily!
I spent most of highschool feeling like a big fish in a small pond. It bored me. I prefer it now being a spec on the radar here. It makes me feel like the possibilities are endless!
No worries- you’ll find your “group” soon. Sometimes it takes a bit to grow, but it’ll happen!
Me too! I hated it, it was literally like being in a fish bowl. Not my thing.
I don’t really like merlot either, if I go red I usually go shiraz or cab.
And I think I like big fish/small pond and small fish/big pond scenarios for different areas of my life, but I think it’s good to go through the stages of growing from one to the other.
Oh and if I havent told you yet, I think you’re amazingly brave.
I love being a little fish in a big pond. I too find it exciting that you can do whatever you want because no one knows you.
Hugs. You’ll find your people there soon enough.
I felt like a big fish in a small pond in high school. I moved from the burbs (Burke to be exact) of NoVa to slower lower DE and it was a weird change. Moving to Philly made me feel like a small fishy in a big pond and I like it a lot. It’s nice to have the ability to blend in but also to explore lots and lots of options and opportunities.
You’ll get there, hon! PS – I’m not huge on Merlot, but my sister’s hubs loves the Smoking Loon variety.
I don’t know much about merlots personally, but I would suggest as a whole (since you’re in VA now) that you should try some of the local VA wines. I’m from Springfield originally and am in Fredericksburg now, and there are a TON of wineries not far from the NoVA area which are really terrific. If you go west on 66, and since you’re in Tysons you’re not that far, there are a ton of wineries in the Front Royal area (within 45min-1hour), or if you go down 95 and then west to Charlottesville (about 2-2.5 hours) there are a ridiculous amount of local wineries. I’m a huge fan of Virginia wine, and I would definitely suggest checking some of them out!
Awesome, thank you! I definitely will!
I cant imagine uprooting myself and starting all over somewhere new like you have. I have no doubt that you’ll make a whole bunch of great new friends, and feel like you belong in no time.
I’ve always felt like an average fish in an average pond. Is that weird?
Haha, no not at all. That’s how I felt in Oklahoma City and in college. I liked it because you kind of feel more ownership over your surroundings that way, if that makes sense?
Ok, I’m definitely not a Merlot girl either, but I do like Penfold’s Merlot. It’s a good one. All I can say is go to Trader Joe’s. Go to the “other reds” section. Find the La Granga tempranillo with the purple pig on the label. Buy a bottle (it will be cheap). Thank me later.
I also really like the Il Valore sangiovese. They’re both really smooth. I got your wine back on the internets, girl. All the rest of the uneasiness with the move with smooth out, I’m sure of it. Just roll with it- oh, and drink wine. It helps. 
The $2.50 sangiovese I bought last time wasn’t that bad either
I’m going to get the La Granga tonight. Thank you!
It can be hard starting over in a new place, especially at the beginning when you’re still trying to make friends/navigate your neighborhood/figure out where everything is. Once the initial awkwardness is over, though, I think you’re going to be really happy.
I’m not a merlot drinker, I either stick with Pinot or Malbec. Hey, all my friends like you! So there’s that!
Haha, I wasn’t sure after some of the events that transpired Sunday night!
I’m sure I’d feel homesickness/people sickness in the beginning a lot too! You have a lot of good people in your life:)
I definitely like to be a little fish in a big pond
I know this is a completely different situation, but the first part of your post echoed the same things I felt when going to college and then later when I transferred. I felt like a visitor instead of a resident and it was awkward. I missed the familiarity of just knowing things about a place. But after a few weeks those feelings died away and now I feel like I know the place like the back of my hand. I bet you’ll feel the same way in some time.
If I’m being completely honest, friends are the hardest thing to replace. Though I have my group of friends at school, I still haven’t built relationships that hold a candle to my friends from home. I think as we grow up and move around more this becomes harder and harder. Thank goodness for social media!
I’m not a fan of merlot’s. I’m a reisling girl through and through. I’ve always been a small fish in a big pond. My advice is to try something new every day. Take a different way to work, explore a new neighborhood, don’t be afraid to go to a bar alone. Trust me, you’ll make friends in a flash. Especially if people find out your new in town. They’ll buy you drinks
I’ve always felt like a small fish in a big pond. My high school graduating class had over 1,000 people, just to give you prospective. I think I like it that way though. Don’t worry. Give it time, you will make friends before you know it. You seem like such a nice person, there is no reason that you won’t be able to find your place there.
I’m not a big Merlot drinker. I usually stick to Cabernet or Pinot Noir.
So glad you’re loving your new life! I like the feeling of being a small fish in a big pond, too.
Wish I knew anything about wine, but I don’t…sorry I can’t help!
I’m glad you’re the same because, shoot, I like you how you are.
You are living such an exciting life. Embrace the newness and keep in touch with those friends back home. Everyone is here for you!
Good question!!! I think I prefer to be a big fish in a little pond …
I’m with you on Merlot – either I don’t like it or I don’t know what it should taste like. I love Pinot Nior and Cabernet Sauvignons the best. I just entered the world of red wine a year or so ago so I’m not that well educated on it – but I’m interested to hear if you explore the Merlot varieties a little more and what you come up with!
I am so impressed with your attitude!!! Wow. You are such a positive person!
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