Life has been throwing a lot of unanswerable questions at me lately. Such as…
Why are you talking to me while I’m peeing? It is not social hour, it’s urination. Leave me alone.
Why do hotel pillows always suck? You can keep your fancy feather pillows. My head just sinks right through them to the mattress. They do no one any good.
Why do I always have good hair days when no one sees me, and bad hair days when I have something important going on? Every time. Every SINGLE time.
Why hasn’t anyone invented a device that shuts off your cell phone after you’ve consumed two alcoholic beverages? No good can come from three beers and the “reply all” button.
Why do the best people get dealt the worst hands? It’s almost certain that both of my grandparents do, in fact, have cancer. In a way it’s kind of poetic that they’re going through this together – just like they have everyone else in their lives. But it also really sucks.
Why do I keep writing things on this blog that are so depressing and self-serving? I’m going to work on this. I promise.
I don’t want this to become the place where everyone comes to cry. Or to listen to me cry. Or the place you don’t go, because you don’t want to feel like crying.
I definitely feel the instinct to write every feeling I have about what I’m going through on the blog. I don’t know why, but something about releasing that sadness and speaking fondly of my beloved grandparents (who are as much parents to me as my real parents are) just makes me feel better.
But it’s getting to be depression-ville around here, and no one wants that.
Life is as sweet as it is bitter. (It’s always darkest before the dawn… It’s better have had loved and lost, than never to loved at all… you get the point.)
Positivity may not be my strong suit, but realism is, and things are not ever so bad that you can’t find something uplifting, funny or maybe even a little inappropriate to bring a smile to your face.
I really plan to do a better job of embodying that around here, instead of just constant doom and gloom.
Thanks to everyone who’s stuck with me and my moping the past couple of weeks. But don’t feel like you always have to say nice things about my situation. I’d appreciate a joke, a funny story or your own befuddling rhetorical questions just as much.
We’re all in this life thing together.
I’m all for the bitter and depression. Seriously. If that’s where you’re at, that’s where you’re at. In my life, I’ve found that I have much more to say during times of chaos than times of peace. And if you’re like us, talking about chaos makes us feel like we’re getting through something (even if we aren’t). I feel for you, friend. Just be true to yourself and write what’s wearing on your heart.
Yeah, I think maybe I should start journaling some of it and try to be more selective of what I post here. Sometimes I just feel icky about it, for reasons I can’t fully explain.
Your honesty is why I love you. We all go through highs and lows and it’s refreshing you can be so raw and honest.
Keep your head up, lady friend. Things will all work out as they should. Promise.
Writing about the lows will probably help you deal, so keep them coming as long as you need to! That’s what we’re all here for : )
Also, re:good hair days – I feel the same about my cutest outfits. I always ruin them by wearing them on occasions where no pictures are taken. Such a waste. White girl problems.
Yes. I try to plan a good outfit around my more social days, and purposely dress worse when I know I won’t be seen. I put way too much thought into it.
I just spent some time catching up on your posts. And I just wanted to let you know I’m sending positive thoughts and vibes to you and yours. I agree with Rose, just be true to yourself, and share whatever and whenever you need to.
I think you should write about what you feel like writing about. And also, I hate feather pillows in hotels. They make me sneezy and stuffy.
That too! Everything about them is terrible.
I really need my phone to shut off when I’ve been drinking. I have a habit of sending people pictures. We won’t talk about it.
Also, I don’t think you’re all doom and gloom. Writing about what you’re feeling is a good thing. You need to get it out somewhere right?
Haha, one of the biggest blessings in my life is that I’m utterly incapable of the self portrait.
I totally agree about the good hair day/ bad hair day thing … Murphey’s law hey!!?
Love your face <3
I like the idea of a device that shuts off your phone after too many drinks. Someone needs to get on that – pronto. My dignity is at stake.
And I have to chime in and agree with everyone else – your honesty is inspiring and you should never feel like you have to censor yourself. We all go through ups and downs and I prefer a blogger who is honest and real to one that is fake any day of the week.
You’re being too hard on yourself again.
You write honestly and that’s good. If writing about the shitty stuff helps you cope, then write it! I agree about the hotel pillow thing and it’s not cool. Except at the Sheraton. They have exceptionally comfortable beds.